Resilience is the ability to bounce back after something goes wrong. In our modern world, it is celebrated as one of the most important qualities needed to get ahead in life. “That actor/singer/inventor, everyone told them no, but they were too resilient to quit and pushed until they achieved their dream.” It’s a story we hear all the time. It’s an encouragement that we should never let anything hold us back!
Unfortunately, the lesson of resilience has been skewed. Once it taught us that we can still be successful after a setback. But many people have turned it to mean that nothing should ever affect me. Or more colloquially, “never let them see you sweat.” It makes me think of the story of Job. We don’t have room to get into the full story; suffice it to say he lost everything: home, livestock, children, even his health.
As he’s going through it, Job is visited by his three friends. Job 2:11-13, “Now when Job's three friends heard of all this evil that had come upon him, they came each from his own place…They made an appointment together to come to show him sympathy and comfort him. And when they saw him from a distance, they did not recognize him. And they raised their voices and wept, and they tore their robes…And they sat with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his suffering was very great.”
If you know the whole story, then you know these three friends eventually ruined this gesture of kindness by giving speeches about why this is all happening and that it might be Job’s fault. But they started off with the right spirit. They saw that their friend was suffering and came to comfort him. They sat with him for seven days listening to Job and weeping with him.
Sometimes that’s exactly what we need. Sometimes you need to let your friends know what you’re going through and allow them to spend time with you. God never called you to be the picture of resilience, you don’t need to immediately bounce up from every set back. The events of your life will affect you.
And if you don’t need to be comforted right now, I bet there’s someone who could use some comforting by you. Find them. Sit with them.