Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 – 9 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil.10 For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! 11 Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? 12 And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
In the early 1940s the UK was under constant threat of attack because of the war. As part of the war effort the UK government came up with, what our modern eyes would see as, an ad campaign. These were slogans that the British citizens could rally behind while trying to live life in the face of an unpredictable hazard. The most famous one, because of its recent renewal (and subsequent abuse) was: “Keep Calm and Carry On,” evoking that classic British stiff-upper lip mentality. All these slogans were to help the citizens see that they were all in this situation together.
My favorite of these rallying phrases is “Make Do and Mend.” I love it because it reminds us that we need to maintain the things that are important to us. Our present day struggles with throw-away culture and planned obsolescence have driven us down a road where mending isn’t really a part of our daily lives anymore. The trouble arises when this thinking worms its way into everything including, our relationships, it’s easier to leave someone behind than to help them along.
Every relationship will have some level of making do—which has the beautiful definition of managing with the limited or inadequate means available—because none of us are perfect. This is easy for us to accept most of the time. It’s the second half of the phrase that makes us uncomfortable.
Mending is hard, especially mending relationships. Sometimes you have to be the bigger person and apologize first. Sometimes you need to be brave and tell someone they hurt you. Sometimes you need to show love to someone with whom you fundamentally disagree. As the writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us, we need each other. There will be times when you fall down, and you need someone to help you up. There will be times that you will need to be the forgiver, however, there are also many times that we will need to be forgiven.
We’ve all known people who live with a “my way or the highway” mindset. Eventually, most people choose the highway. Cultivate a soft heart with the people you are close to. Let us be the ones that are quick to forgive, and even quicker to mend our relationships.
We need each other.