Parenting through the hard stuff - Part 1

There’s this really happy go-lucky part of my personality that really wants things to be sunsets and flowers every day. It’s what makes me more optimistic than pessimistic, what helps me see the glass as half full, and compels me to chases after joy every chance I get. It is also what makes it so hard for me to sit down and talk about difficult topics with my children. I want to brush over the bad and rush to the good, focus on “rejoice with those who rejoice” but leave out the “weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15). Sometimes however, there are hard conversations that must be had, and tears that need to be cried. They can’t be avoided, ignored, or covered with a Band-Aid.

The past few weeks have brought on some of these heavy conversations. Conversations that, If I’m being honest, I wish I didn’t have to have with my children. The first was spurred on after a 4 year-old boy tragically died a few weekends ago in our town. The second came on the heels of the protests in Charlottesville this past weekend. Both were tragedies in their own right; one of an innocent life lost that affected many in our community, the other an indication of the hatred and racism that still exist in our nation. 

While there are many great resources out there about how to talk about tragedy, we should find that our response as Christians is different than what the secular world offers. We are called to be Holy, which means set apart, and part of that is looking at tragedy through a Gospel lens. It is a view that is not apologetic about the sin and hurt in the world, but offers a hope and reconciliation that is only possible through Christ. This truth should inform how we process events as adults and in speaking with our children. 

This week, consider what it means to look at tragedy through a Gospel focus. In the following weeks, we will consider how that Gospel lens will shape the conversations we have with our children and one another in the wake of tragedy. 

Does your response to death and tragedy mirror that of the world? Or is your response marked by the Savior and his work on the cross? 

Justice in Tragedy

That’s not fair! We have heard these words and we have all said these words. We as human beings put a high value on fairness. When we see injustice, it makes us very angry. One of the most difficult things to understand is why?

Jesus tells his disciples, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) Jesus knew that life is not fair. We will experience difficult times and we may never get the answers this side of eternity.

How should we as believers respond in these situations? I was reading an article shared on Facebook regarding the atrocities people face. What came up in the comments, as does inevitably, was the response that “everything happens for a reason” and that “it is all part of God’s plan.” It was met with some strong disapproval and I found myself cringing.

While I can understand the heart behind these sayings, and yes, in the grand scheme of things God is sovereign and in control, this is not always the most helpful response to tragedy. One writer explains that, “Sometimes bad things happen [because] we are human beings having a human experience. Pain, heartache, grief, loss, disease and death are inevitable parts of the human experience.” The apostle Paul reminds us that while we are new creations and we have been made alive in Christ, that we are still confined to dying bodies. (Romans 7:24) We are still citizens of a broken world.

Telling someone who has experienced tragedy that everything happens for a reason is not necessarily the best comfort. Too often it is said as a catch-all statement when we don’t know what else to say. Especially when we do not know that reason. God does know the reason, and we may know it in time or maybe never. Instead of trying to fix our friend’s tragedy we focus on being there with them. We cannot fix everyone’s hurt, only the Holy Spirit can do that, but we can acknowledge their pain and be there WITH them in their time of need.

Trusting

I started journaling. Again. I’ve started several times. They start out as a daily part of my devotions. What inevitably happens is I miss a day and decide, “I’d switch to weekly entries.” Then I’d miss a week and decide to make the entries monthly. You can see where this is going. When I look through my journals I notice gaps of sometimes a whole year from one page to the next. Even though they’re not consistent, I do still appreciate that I can look back at snapshots of things I have prayed about or read in my devotions. 

One such snapshot was from April of this year. I was reading that day’s passage from Chambers’ My Utmost for His Highest. On a good day, I can grasp half of what Oswald says. April 20th the passage was titled, “Can a Saint Slander God?” Chambers explains that the parable of the talents (Matthew 25) warns us that it is possible for us to misjudge our spiritual capacity. Meaning that, sometimes we let our circumstances affect our ability to trust God. When the servants were given talents from their master, the first two invested and received double the original portion. The third servant buried his talent out of fear. When the master returned, and asked why this servant buried his talent his response was that he knew the master to be a ‘hard man’ reaping where he did not sow. This servant had justified his actions (or inaction) and believed that what his master asked of him was out of proportion to what was given to him. This servant was implying that his master set him up for failure. He was scared so he buried his talent. 

Do you believe the promises of God or do you slander Him by your actions? It is easy to become overwhelmed. Things happen that we cannot anticipate all the time. The Holy Spirit equips us. When we lose ourselves to worry, we are implying that God is going to leave us hanging. 2 Corinthians 1:20-24 encourages us that “the promises of God find their Yes in him” and that “it is God who establishes us and He has put his seal on us and given us His Spirit as a guarantee.” 

When it comes to trusting the Holy Spirit don’t stop because you’re scared. Don’t let the limitations of your natural ability interfere with what God can do through you. Our capacity in spiritual matters is measured by the promises of God. Is God able to fulfill His promises? Yes, if we allow Him to work through us.

Mer-seas

I was sitting on a beach chair on one of those warm but windy and mildly chilly days with my feet in the sand. I started just watching my kids running into and away from the ocean waves. And an old hymn started running through my mind. The words are, “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning, new every morning, great is thy faithfulness Oh Lord, great is thy faithfulness.”

The ocean never stops. There will never be a day where you walk onto the beach and the water is completely still and no waves lap up on the shore. Sometimes the water is close; it’s high tide and the water is deep. Other times, the water is far away; it’s low tide and the water is shallow. Either way it never stops. I was reminded of that line referring to God’s mercies being new every morning. Just like the ocean waves, God’s love never ceases.

We all have days where we feel like we can wade in the water thinking, “I am in control and can walk for miles.” Other times we feel tossed about and trying to keep our head up is all we can do. Either way we are still safe in the creator’s hands. We may feel like giving up. We feel as though our thoughts are deceiving and we’re buying the enemies lies. Sometimes we feel unlovable. This is when we need to remember that unlike our human capabilities, God’s love is steadfast. God’s faithfulness is never failing, never tired, and will never cease.

Next time you are sitting on the beach looking out on the water, remember that the sea is not unending. It looks like it is, and sometimes can feel like it is, but if you go long enough in one direction you will reach another shore. God’s love, however is unending and steadfast and his mercies are new every morning. Lamentations 3:22-23, The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Thinking Inside the Box

Do you remember when you were very young and you found an empty cardboard box? There was nothing more exciting than jumping in and flying through space in your rocket, or floating down a raging river in your boat, or, if it was big enough, turning it into your own private house where you could do anything you wanted because you made the rules. A simple cardboard box fueled by your childlike sense of wonder could be anything, do everything, and go anywhere. It was four-sided cardboard freedom.

Then, on no particular day, you got a little older and only saw a box. The question stopped being what can this become and started being how much can we put in here? Did you label it with what’s inside? Why isn’t this thrown out yet? It’s never an active decision. No one comes out and says, “it’s the year 20XX and boxes are no longer fun and only to be used practically.” Numerous studies have shown the creativity inherent in children; they can see endless opportunities.

Adults however stop seeing opportunities and start seeing impossibilities. I can’t do that, I have bills. I can’t do that, I have kids. I can’t do that, I have a job. I can’t do that, I am too old/young. The greatest limiting factor we have is ourselves. If you could see yourself the way God sees you, then you would feel invincible. If God could show you a picture of what it will look like when you get there, you'd have no concerns about trying. But He won't, so you'll just have to trust. There’s a phrase that has been said so often that we wave it away as a cliché, but that doesn’t make it any less true: God loves you just the way you are but he loves you too much to let you stay that way.

Psalm 139:13-16 says,

For you[God] formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. (ESV)

The way you saw that cardboard box as a child is the way God sees you now. You are filled with endless possibilities. You can have bills, kids, a job, or be old/young and still do great things for God. If we can put our excuses away and echo the words of Isaiah 6:8, “Here am I. Send me,” then God could do amazing things.

God’s not done with you yet.

What Are You Planting

A parable is an earthly story that contains a spiritual truth. In Matthew 13, Jesus tells the parable of the sower (someone that plants seeds), “A sower went out to sow. And as he sowed, some seeds fell along the path, and the birds came and devoured them. Other seeds fell on rocky ground, where they did not have much soil, and immediately they sprang up, since they had no depth of soil, but when the sun rose they were scorched. And since they had no root, they withered away. Other seeds fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up and choked them. Other seeds fell on good soil and produced grain…” (Matt 13:3-9 ESV)

This is a popular parable we use in the Church to discuss the different ways people encounter the Gospel. As Jesus explains it later in the passage some people don’t give it a chance to take root, some people get excited but lose interest once things get hard, some like what they hear but get distracted, and finally some people hear it and grow (Matt 13:19-23). One fascinating aspect of this parable is that we rarely talk about the actual sower. The sower, the person we are supposed model ourselves after, represents someone sharing the Gospel and he/she doesn’t seem to care who hears it. He/she is just sowing everywhere he/she can. When you plant grains, you don’t need tidy rows or perfect lines—it’s a grass so you throw it everywhere it might be able to grow to get the biggest yield.

Too often we get afraid, nervous, or uncomfortable sharing the Gospel. We feel the need to cultivate perfect soil, find the perfect moment, and be able to say the perfect thing before we can share the Gospel. We can talk for hours about how our favorite movie is the best movie ever made, but once it gets to things that matter eternally we clam up and shut down. I had a pastor once tell me, “You cannot talk anybody into heaven, using your power of persuasion won’t save anybody’s soul—God does that part. Our purpose as Christians is just to share the good news that has [hopefully] changed our lives.”

I hope you are able to share some the good news in a kind and loving way with those around you. You are a sower, how the Gospel lands is not your responsibility just that it is shared.

Amazing Grace

The high school I worked at in Colorado was about 20 students and was self-contained within a middle school. Near the end of the year they held a building wide talent show. During the show, you had your normal run of middle school student talents: singing, dancing, skits that are only fun to that kid’s friends, etc. But one act really stood out to me. A teacher and two students played guitars and did a TERRIBLE rendition of Amazing Grace. The singers were off key, the guitars were slightly out of tune, and one of the kids forgot the words about halfway through. I loved it.

The reason I loved it is because these kids sang their guts out. I never interacted with these students so I have no idea what they believed. The fact that they were students at this school told me that they probably know what it’s like to consider yourself a wretch. Though this was a secular public school they chose to sing about one of the cornerstones of our faith Grace.

At this school, it became a daily exercise of showing grace. Our school was the last step between the regular public schools and residential treatment. Every day was a series of choosing your battles. A kid curses let it go ask her about her math. A kid punches you in the arm to say good morning redirect him to the more appropriate handshake. Obviously, this was on a case-by-case basis, and consequences were faced, but our focus was to meet these kids where they were, no matter how far behind that was and help them graduate high school.

I had an old admin describe some people as EGRs (Extra Grace Required). These are the students that frustrate you by not doing things efficiently. This is the kid that really wants to help get dinner made but mostly gets in the way. This is the barista that is having a terrible day and screws up your coffee. When we encounter these people we make a choice: am I going to make this interaction about me and my frustration or am I going to show grace by helping them?

If you have come to faith in Jesus all your sin, all your annoying habits, all your attempts to work out your own salvation have been forgiven. God’s grace has covered them all. Romans 5:8 says, “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” We have been forgiven so much, should we not share that forgiveness with others also? Who can you be more gracious towards? Who can you thank for showing grace to you?

Mo Money Less Problems?

One of the more famous stories of the Bible is that of the rich young man in Matthew 19. A very wealthy guy comes up to Jesus and says, “Teacher, what good deed must I do to have eternal life?” At first blush this seems like a valid question, and he apparently knows enough to ask the right person about it. Jesus obviously knows what this guy is angling for but because he is nicer than me, Jesus engages with him and asks about his knowledge of the laws of Moses. The guy says he knows those and keeps those but still feels he’s missing something and asks what he is still lacking. Jesus tells him to sell all his stuff, give the money to the poor, and become his disciple. And the rich guy goes away sad because he was super-duper rich.

After this interaction Jesus tells his disciples, “Truly I say to you, only with difficulty will a rich person enter the kingdom of heaven. Again, I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.” It’s easy to look at this and become self-inflated because you KNOW Jesus is talking about people that are richer than you. Those sinners. But, as with most sinners in the Bible, this rich guy was a stand-in for us. His problem was that he was reliant on his own resources to meet all his needs on Earth and for eternity.

Before you can have faith, you must recognize that you have needs that you cannot solve yourself. This rich young man probably bought his way out of any number of jams. I think most of us wish we had the throw-it-at-your-problems-until-they-go-away money, but even if we did we couldn’t buy our way into heaven.

The rich young man wanted a quick fix. He wanted the “One Weird Trick” that clickbait articles promise. But the reality is Jesus is the only path to eternal life. We are saved by faith through his death, burial, and resurrection. In putting our trust in Jesus, we hand over control. We don’t like being out of control. The rich young man didn’t need to have faith in his money because he knew it was there. He had seen over and over its power to pull him out of problems. Trusting is hard, but as Christians we are called to take a long view to see how all things work together for our good.

Getting What You Asked For

“And Peter answered him, ‘Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.’ He said, ‘Come.’ So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus.” (Matthew 14:28-29)

I wonder if Peter really knew what he was asking when he asked Jesus to command him to come out to him on the water. Did he really think Jesus would invite him to come? To step out of the boat and walk on the water?

What’s more, Jesus didn’t give him a lot of details. He didn’t give him instruction. He just said, “come.”

Credit where credit is due: Peter gets out of the boat and walks on the water and comes to Jesus. I don’t know how long he walked on the water, but it’s longer than I ever have! He walked on literal water in the middle of a literal storm. All because Jesus said, “come”.

One of the most frustrating things about following Jesus is that what we think we want, and what he wants for us, are often not quite the same thing. Peter asked to walk on water, but once he was out there, it didn’t look (or feel) quite like he expected. Whatever he thought he would accomplish by getting out of the boat wasn’t what Jesus wanted to accomplish in him by demonstrating the power of Christ, even over our fears.

Equally frustrating, however, is that Christ often doesn’t give us any more instruction than what we need to take the first step. His instruction to Peter consisted of nothing more than a single word: come. It was an invitation to take a step in his direction. A small step that probably felt more like a leap of faith as Peter stepped off the side of the boat and into the storm.

When I’m facing challenging situations, or situations that didn’t turn out how I expected, this is the reminder I need to take the next step: Jesus said come. Come when your burdened. Come when you’re tired. Come when you’re confused. Come when you’re happy. Come when you’re sad.

Just come. 

What does it mean to be one?

“There is one body and one Spirit–just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call–one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.” (Eph 4)

Imagine for a second that you lived in the first century, and you recently got a job promotion that was going to move your family away from your hometown and into a foreign city called Ephesus. You’d probably visit Ephesus: check out school districts, find the best neighborhoods, pick a house, and settle in. After you’re there you’d start looking for a church community nearby. Which church would you go to?

It’s sort of a trick question.

If you moved into Ephesus, and you were a Christian, you would have gone to the church in Ephesus. That singular church may have met in multiple homes with different congregations in each one, but they would have shared a common leadership amongst them. The only question for your family was which gathering met closest to your home.

When Paul writes to the Ephesians and tells them that they need to strive to be one body, that’s the context he’s writing in. He knew that even though the Ephesian Christians were all technically part of the same church, the “oneness” that the Gospel creates was going to take active commitment. The Christians needed to be reminded that they are all “one body”.

21st century America doesn’t look like first century Ephesus. Most people in America live within reasonable driving distance of several churches from different denominations with slightly different theologies offering a variety of different ministries. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it does make it even more difficult to remember that, at the end of the day, every single orthodox Christian, regardless of church background or affiliation, is part of the exact same “one body” of Christ–and all the other “ones” that Paul mentions.

That’s not to suggest (as some have) that every church should just get rid of their distinctions and become one big church again. Some researchers have even argued that it’s in “agreeing to disagree” on certain issues that allows us to maintain unity in the church on our essential beliefs. Convictions on certain issues, or the culture of a group of people, mean that sometimes ultimate unity will be easier to maintain as friends rather than partners.

On the other hand, a proper understanding of “oneness” reminds us that every Christian church shares something significant in common. This understanding of “oneness” in Christ is why we can dialogue with a neighbor church like Covenant about whether we can accomplish more together than separately. For both of us merging is not a requirement; it is an opportunity.

At the end of the day (literally), we’re going to spend an eternity with those brothers and sisters; maybe it makes sense to start getting to know each other now!

Who Do You Want to Be?

There’s an on-going debate in our house surrounding the value of social media. It typically ends like this - introvert husband is convinced of the evils of social media; extrovert wife can’t stay off it and argues for its redemptive value. Despite the many arguments I present, the research is not in favor of social media. This recent study confirms what my husband argues on the regular - the use of Facebook is negatively associated with overall well-being.

It goes on to explain why this may happen. “Exposure to the carefully curated images from others’ lives leads to negative self-comparison, and the sheer quantity of social media interaction may detract from more meaningful real-life experiences.”

Have you seen that “Christian Girl” Instagram video? It’s a how-to guide for perfectly framing your Instagram posts to make you look super holy. It’s hilarious, but mostly because it is accurate in its mockery of the lengths we go to present ourselves in the best light. Unfortunately, even if we know that this image of others on social media is not totally true, we see what others are doing and comparison creeps in. Then, in an effort to combat our bad feelings, we try frantically to model our lives after what we see others doing.

It’s particularly challenging for new parents. A few minutes online and you feel like you should make your baby food from scratch with home grown organic veggies harvested from your family garden. (I tried a vegetable garden once, and out of it grew some amazing weeds - thanks internet!) It’s not just parenting, and it’s not a new problem. Paul warned the Romans, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God”.

The difference between “conforming” and “transforming” has a lot to do with the information that we feed into our mind. If our primary input is social media, we’re likely to conform. If our primary input is God and His word, however, we’ll find ourselves transformed to view the world through the lens of God’s “good, pleasing, and perfect will.”

The best part? We don’t have to fake it!

Unforced Rhythms of Grace

There is a popular blog post that makes the internet circuit around this time every year titled “Worst End of School Year Mom Ever”. In it, the author recounts all the ways in which she lets everything go at this time of year, from neglecting homework, to holes in shoes, and forgotten Lunchables. While many parents and children enter the school year with enthusiasm by the end many of us are failing pretty hard and ready for the summer break.

Even if you don’t have a child in school, you can relate to those seasons of life and the exhaustion that comes when you feel burnt out, tired, and ready to give up. Summer it seems, with the warm weather and long days, is the time that we expect to rest and take a break from the rigorous routine of life. We look forward to vacations, long Saturdays at a lake, or by the shore. 

Long before school breaks and summer vacations, Jesus uttered these words in Matthew 11, 

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me - watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live free and lightly.”(Matt 11:28-30(MSG))

For years I had this verse laminated on our shower wall. When our oldest kids were little and never slept, something about these words stirred in me a longing. To live free and lightly. To be unburdened. It’s not about sleep or physical rest—it’s a rest for your soul. Jesus calls us to something deeper and more meaningful than our physical bodies can understand. It’s a rest from your striving, from aiming to please, and from the perfectionism that we chase day after day. It’s a rest from religiousness and all the self-imposed laws that go with it. That kind of soul rest, is called Grace, and Jesus offers it freely and in abundance. 

You don’t need a summer vacation to find rest for your weary soul (although it helps!), the real soul changing work has already been done for you on the cross, and His Grace is sufficient!

#Fathersthoughts

As I cleaned up my dog’s mess for what feels like the 78th time in two weeks I had a sobering thought. “How many times has God done this for me?” Then I thought about my kids. Sure, we love our dog but not in the same way that I love my kids.

When I became a father, I had this realization that my wife and I had made this little person. There was now a new person that existed on the Earth. And we were directly responsible for her. This was, to quote Marty McFly, heavy. This little person was half me and half my wife, she carried our image. I never thought I would be able to love something the way I loved my daughter. Then we had our second child, another girl. Leading up to her birth I did not know how I could love them both so much, but I did. What my wife and I both found was that our hearts grew and we had this new expanded capacity to love—and love unconditionally. This new love was like nothing else. It was then that I got a glimpse of God’s love for us.

But God’s love is a perfect love. If you are a parent, you know that while you always love your children you may not always like your children. In Psalm 23:5 David claims that, “[GOD] prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies…my cup overflows.” This is the part of Psalm 23 always stuck with me. In ancient near eastern culture, if you were a guest in someone’s home you knew you were welcome to stay if your host kept refilling your drink. If you were overstaying your welcome, the host could cut you off and hope you get the hint.

God is not like that. Through his perfect love, we as believers have a seat at God’s table, and our cup overflows. God’s unconditional love never grows tired of the mistakes we make or cleaning up our messes. Therefore, David can continue in verse 6 with, “[WE] shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.”

Our Father does not just love us, but He likes us too! He wants to spend time with us! I hope you’re letting him fill your cup.

Bless This Mess

It’s happening again. You’re yelling at the kids to get their shoes on because “we’re going to be late!” While the rest of your neighborhood soundly sleeps, and is not taking in the beauty of another Sunday morning, you and your family are frantically running out the door trying to get to church.

We go to church for several very good reasons but some Sundays those reasons feel lost in the bedlam of actually getting there. We make it just in time to get the kids checked in, grab a bagel, and grab a seat. We consider it a success if we only miss most of the first song. It can be hard to shake off all that chaos and get into worship mode.

In Acts 16, Paul and Silas are preaching the gospel throughout Asia carrying out God’s call. Their activities landed them in prison. (v. 19-23) Not just in a cell but in the equivalent of solitary confinement with their feet in stocks. (v. 24) This was after they were severely beaten with rods. How did they handle this disruption? The Bible tells us that at midnight, they were praying and singing praises to the Lord. So loudly, in fact, that the rest of the prisoners heard them. (v. 25)

Somehow Paul and Silas could shake off their surroundings and create glory unto God in their terrible circumstances. While they were singing loudly and praying there was an earthquake and the doors flew open and their chains fell off! (v. 26) Not only did Paul and Silas’ chains fall off, but so did the chains of the other prisoners. Acts 16 continues on to tell how Paul and Silas’ praises had a huge impact on those around them: the jailer and his family, and quite possibly many of the other prisoners received salvation.

It can be hard to shake off the ordeal of a Sunday morning with all that goes along with coordinating your squad, but remember that when you can praise God in your mess it not only frees you but can free those around you.

Have a blessed week!

Can They See It On Your Face?

When Moses spent time in the presence of the LORD, his face would physically shine after coming down from the mountain. In Exodus 34:35, it is recorded that, “The people of Israel would see the face of Moses, that the skin of Moses’ face was shining.” It was so unsettling, that Aaron, Moses’ brother and the high priest of Israel, suggested that Moses wear a veil. “And Moses would put the veil over his face again, until he went in to speak with [the Lord].”

When you come to church, what does your face look like? After you celebrate Jesus through worship and opening the Word what does it look like? What an incredible thing it must have been to see Moses’ face shining after spending time in God’s presence. A respected brother of mine shared a very profound illustration with a few us. After we go on vacation, people often recognize it on our face. We may look refreshed, or even sun-tanned. Either way, people can see that we’ve spent time in the sun. Moses’ face literally reflected the glory of God.

When we spend time with God, I hope people would be able to see it on our faces. Maybe it won’t glow to the point of needing a veil like Moses, but people should be able to recognize that we’ve spent time in the presence of God. When you walk out of church on a Sunday afternoon is your face reflecting the glory of God to those you encounter? Nothing makes me happier than seeing joyful worshippers enjoying God’s presence during worship. 

Smiling and waving and clapping and just letting go can at times be a challenge for me. But when I am able to forget about what I may look like I am free to experience God’s glory and reflect on what He has done for me. Let’s be reflections of that glory together! See you Son-day!

Stressed Out

It feels like spring has officially sprung around here. The weather is getting warmer, the April showers are bringing May flowers, and my car has gone from red to orange—thanks pollen. It seems like it happens every year about this time; just before you reach your breaking point of dealing with snow and cold the sun pops out and leaves start returning. The cyclical quality of the seasons isn’t something we spend much time worrying about. When it gets too cold or too hot we remind ourselves that it won’t always be like this—better times are coming. Unless you work outside, the weather is probably not anxiety inducing most of the time.

Unfortunately, there is still plenty that we spend our time worrying, fretting, and losing sleep about: paying bills, family stuff, job responsibilities, and that other thing that just popped into your head. Stress and anxiety are meant to be emotions that motivate us towards action. If I wasn’t concerned about being evicted I would never pay my rent. If I wasn’t worried about knowing right from wrong I’d probably steal all the time. In these cases, the stress isn’t huge but it keeps you in line and helps you make good life decisions.

Other times however, the anxiety and stress can become too much and we are overwhelmed. It is during times like this that we are told to turn to our faith. Jesus tells us in Luke 12, “do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes…Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?” This is the easiest thing to say to someone else and can be the hardest thing in the world to apply to ourselves.

We worship a God that sees the whole picture. If you’re like me you can remember a time you woke up with that boulder of stress on your chest and you thought it would never go away. But hopefully you can also look at how God used that to bring you into happier times. Weeping can last for the night, the longest night of your life, but joy comes with the morning. My prayer is that we can keep our faith especially when we get distracted by stress or anxiety. 

Working Like A Bear

If you look at the banner at the top you will see that I am dressed as a bear. I was hosting a talent show at our student ministries summer camp when this photo was taken. I was having an awesome time, even if my face may appear to say otherwise—bear suits can get a little hot. And this isn’t any off-the-rack, Halloween store bear suit. This beast of an undertaking was custom tailored by my former admin Jo Ann and her friend over the course of a few weeks. I think making it broke at least three sewing machines.

Creating this costume was a long hard labor of love that she did entirely off the clock. In terms of practical use at summer camps and youth groups the bear suit has gotten maybe four hours of practical use in front of students. At this point many reasonable people start thinking about logic and efficiency and bring up questions of whether it was worth the time and effort she put in if it was going to be used so little. And I answer with a resounding YES!

There is an unfortunate trend that is happening in churches, ministries, and unfortunately in the hearts of Christians today. It is the simple, but dangerous, thought of “What’s the least we can do that’s still effective?” When the question we should really be asking is, “What is the best we can do?” As Christians, we have been called to a higher purpose, but our worldly minds tug us towards laziness.

Colossians 3:23-24 says, “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” If we can hold on to this perspective it can cause our hard work to make more sense. Yes, sometimes it feels like you’re pushing a rock up a hill. Or you feel that it’s not going to bear any fruit. Or you dressed up in a silly bear suit that’s too hot and a little itchy. In all we do we must keep focus on the one we are doing it for not the immediate rewards we might receive. We don’t do this to gain extra favor. We don’t do this to earn salvation. We work hard because it is the right thing to do.

What’s the best you can do?

Just Let Me Sleep

On Easter Sunday Morning, I woke up to the makings of a beautiful day. The sun was shining. The birds were chirping. It was that kind of weather that was warm but never gets too hot. Best of all we were all coming together to celebrate the resurrection of our savior Jesus Christ. It was the kind of day that inspires you to face the work week with a smile on your face.

And then every day this week I’ve been awakened by the sound of a jackhammer breaking up concrete. More reliable than a rooster on a farm 7am rolls around and it’s GRRRAKKA KKAKKAKKAK!…GRRRAKKA KKAKKAKKAK! It is not a pleasant way to be awakened. The sleepy part of me tries to convince my body during small pauses that the worker is done. GRRRAKKA!

I’ll probably never know what exactly they were working on. At best, I might walk on the sidewalk after it’s fixed, but in the morning, I just know I’m annoyed. I’m bothered that they woke me up but if I’m really honest I’m probably mostly annoyed that it is out of my control.

I want to walk over in my robe and bunny slippers and tell them to knock it off. They wouldn’t listen, and if they did listen their work wouldn’t get done and I might not have water in my house anymore. Sometimes in life things happen that throw off our plans. We wanted to do X but life says, “NOPE we’re doing Y.”

It’s at times like this we must trust that God’s plan is still in effect for our lives. Romans 8:28 tells us that, “we know that for those who love God all things work together for good.” These means that even our bad days, awakened by jackhammers, can lead to something greater than being annoyed.

Being woken up early is a minor annoyance in the long run. But think back on a rough time in your life that is far enough back that you can see how it led to good things. I graduated seminary in 2009, that was a bad time to graduate. I looked for jobs in my field of counseling for a year and nothing happened, until a friend of mine said he had a position in youth ministry. Youth ministry was not even on my radar, but I took it and we had a blast for five years. Trusting in the plan even in the hard times helps us reach and recognize the good times. What hard times have steered your life to better times?

I Remember Easter

I don’t think I’ve ever missed an Easter Sunday service. Even during periods of my life when I wasn’t attending church as frequently, I’m pretty sure I went on Easter! As a result, I have many memories of Easters-gone-by.

I remember being a kid and feeling like it always rained on Good Friday, and was sunny on Easter. I surmised that this was God’s divine plan, so that we’d remember the sadness of Friday and the happiness of Sunday. (Nevermind observational bias, or the fact that most of my Easter’s were experienced in the Northeast in March or April, when rain and sun in the same day are fairly common!)

I also remember having to wear my Easter outfits. I have no idea why my parents wanted to dress me up like an Easter egg: white pants and a pastel shirt. I hated my Easter outfits, primarily because I knew my mother would not approve of the inevitable grass stains when they finally released me from church. My children often ask me to tell the story of my friend Ian, who I may have “accidentally” pulled into a muddy ditch as we attempted to jump across in our Easter clothes. I’m not sure whose mom was angrier!

Even though my family attended most church services growing up; I still have those special memories of Easter. And if attendance is any indicator (it should be), so do many people in America. Even people who attend church infrequently remember Easter and make special effort to go to church on Easter Sunday.

Did you know that one of the first things the disciples did when they learned of Jesus resurrection was go and invite others to come and see? Many of our friends and neighbors will be remembering Easter in the next few days, and they’ll be wondering what church they can attend with their families where they can celebrate the good news. That’s a great opportunity for us to invite them to Restore (Good Friday 7pm, Easter Sunday 10:30am), where we celebrate the risen Savior every week.

The resurrection of Jesus is the foundation for our courage, for our boldness, for our hope, and for our joy. I’m looking forward to celebrating with our family this weekend as we remember Easter together.

SPOILER ALERT

Have you ever had a friend tell you the ending of a movie or TV show before you saw it?

In our connected and information driven world, it’s harder and harder to avoid. We’ve had viewing parties of popular shows at our house in the past and, since we were typically watching the recorded version, we remind everyone not to go on social media! Don’t look at your phones! Someone was bound to get a text message that would give away the ending before we got to see it.

There are even websites dedicated to spoiling plots of movies. Go to the website, pick a movie, read a complete summary, ruin the movie.

There are times, though, where knowing the ending can enhance the drama of the story. Think of the movie, Titanic (spoiler alert: it sinks.) Or a popular book you read that was turned into a movie. Knowing how it was going to end caused you to perch on the edge of your seat watching the story unfold, knowing the story would resolve, but not being entirely sure how.

That is sort of how the Passion week feels to me. Passion week starts on Palm Sunday, this coming Sunday, and ends on Easter. You might get a sense of victory as he rides the colt of a donkey into Jerusalem. It looks strange, to be sure, but at least the people are cheering his arrival! Then the story takes an odd turn. Jesus is arrested. He is tried. He is beaten. He is crucified. And then he dies. But, we know that Jesus rises from the dead on Easter Sunday.

The fact that we know of Jesus’ resurrection doesn’t diminish the drama of the week; it enhances it. Now the lens through which we view these events isn’t one of defeat, it’s one of victory. Now we look at the events not just with agony, but with wonder: that the God of Gods, the King of Kings, must suffer such shame and sorrow and pain so that, three days later, he is raised up, “the mighty one who saves.”

“The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save.” – Zephaniah 3:17

During the passion week, take some time to reflect on how the resurrection of Jesus changes everything. See his victory in the darkness of seeming defeat. And remember that today, the Lord your God is still in your midst.